It has been a rather exhausting day to say the least. I have taken up a temporary residence at the home of Mini-Meevs these past two days (and to my relief, after hearing of the chaos on the home front) but certainly have I been working to earn my keep! Her grandmother is to be brought in from the nursing home Monday and the necessary preparations, including a very thorough cleaning of the home, need be made. It was fairly vile clawing our way through the mountain of trash thanks for her brother's laziness (and I thought Axel's room was messy.. oh the HORROR of that garage!!) but it was rewarding, any excuse to make a giant bonfire and watch pressurized containers explode... >_>
Now, if only we had added the insect killer and paint thinner... *ahem* ah, disregard that last thought..
Tomorrow, we move the necessary furniture here and organize it and then I spend the evening packing for the coming vacation back north to visit the family. Ah shit, and I must remember to practice my sax.. ahh that probably will not get done >_> Another week of getting distracted, the director will have my non-existing head!
But that should do it for now. Quite a bit to look forward to, and much needed it is.
they inevitably fall again.
Life has become a fairly exhausting spectacle for me as of late. I can come up with no formula, no strategy to control the flow of this dazzling experiment I have been flung into. My head is tired. Hours in classwork are spent sleeping through lecture and paying only the vaguest of attention. I have no desire to eat, think, or interact, only to sleep. My evenings are spent tossing and turning grasping desperately at fleeting hours of rest. I cannot remember the last time I slept straight through an evening. Much chaos between the family and other loved ones has left me in a sea tossed to and fro by the waves whilst trying to balance the never-ending stress of my work. Inspiration is at an all-time low and even the impending vacation cannot seem to life these frozen spirits.
Burned out, exhausted. Call it what you will I can no longer focus on all this. If it is not one damned thing it is another. Can something finally look and up continue to look up?
As the old saying goes, 'what comes up must come down' I suppose.
An afterthought, but after hearing about the rash of little thefts confounding the Organization as of late I took to recounting all my possessions.. and have found my vibrator has gone missing. Cough it up, Ienzo!
- Music:Poets of the Fall: Late Goodbye
Tonight was my last night as a marching rocket, and my was it ever an enjoyable one. My underlings gave quite sweet gifts (and quite the twisted one too:: an ace bandage with a packet of Tylenol arthritis attached.) I shall truly miss all the memories I shared with them and the time I spent shivering, swearing, and slipping in the muddy football fields. 'Twas a truly amazing end to this four-year long mission.
Despite the chaos of earlier events life has yet prevailed with optimism, something I am in dire need of at this point. Spending these days along away at Oblivion becomes quite taxing on the mind and soul without necessary stimulation to coax me to continue. For tonight I'll simply take the time to relax.
Meevs and I have planned an impromptu trip in preparation for the coming vacation tomorrow, I have much to prepare before the 17th. The next three days (and with my birthday on Saturday, I'll spend some time away celebrating with the locals. I do need time away from work too, you know) will be spent relaxing and readying myself to kick into high gear for the week ahead.
For only a week and two days more before I am free to seek refuge in the north with my... ohana as Braig terms it.
Well then, enough prattling on for now. My best wishes to all of you as well, especially you, Braig <3
- Music:Depeche Mode: Home
This shall not be a long entry, on account of I'm extremely tired. Between waking before the dawn for five days straight and the tiring activity of marching around a football field for an hour it gets quite tiring on the mind and body. Thank whatever may listen there are only two games left, it will be wonderful to have my Fridays back and not be absolutely drained every day. I want to sleep so badly but alas, I am not allowed, so I'll sit here at half-consiousness and await the return of my Schemer from wherever the hell he has gone. Some fleeting inspiration flickers in my mind but the spark of school priorities far outweighs the desire to create.
What do they call what I'm feeling now?
Ugh.. *curls up to sleep*
- Music:Egypt Central:: Different
How tiring the cycle of life is at this moment in time. To wake up before the dawn has come, sit and listen to boring and pointless lecture for six hours, and then repeat the same cycle.... How tiring, but at least I have to endure it only until May.
Oh and the band today! I thought the neophytes were unruly, Dear Hearts I've never seen sucha loud, obnoxious crowd of underlings in my life, both existing and non! Is it truly so hard to go to a spot, stand there, and be quiet? A mircle it is that ANYONE gets any work done, at least my assigned squad of underclassmen know what it is to behave and appreciate the fruits of their labors. Any less obedience and I might very well stab myself dead right there on the 50...
At least the inspiration has begin to flow, for now.. Might as well take advantage of it while I still can
Confound this damned inspiration block! Hours I toil over the pages already laden with notes and yet I still find myself at a loss for any sort of inspiration to get myself back to work. A droll and stagnant life I've found myself in, whatever they expected me to find in this suburban Midwestern wasteland I will never know. I've found various ways to entertain my time: interacting with the natives, familiarizing myself with the varying custom of family life from that of the northern territory, the weather, the region, the lackluster sports teams. Anything, anything at all to keep my mind working lest I become lost in this maze of this concrete jungle. The weather has begun to take a foul turn and I am yet only a quarter of the way through my final year of being stationed in this dreadful place. Oh, only a quarter.. why can it not be my date of RTC?
Though I generally give a wide-berth to self-experimentation.. I must say a rather curious thought occurred to me today... Perhaps same day I could utilize this, whether it be on myself or a colleague is yet uncertain but nonetheless it is a muse to entertain. I was able to locate a local to sketch out my idea, damn my lack of artistic skills.http://cowslip.deviantart.com/art/Final-Form-Vexen-sketch-95258485
Oh what to do, what to do... This experimentation means nothing if I must make these discoveries without my scholar...
- Music:A Day to Remember:: If It Means Alot to You